Clarity in mind

                                          photo source: https://static.pexels.com/photos/35884/amazing-beautiful-beauty-blue.jpg

Certain sweetness is there in lovelorn pain

Don't know heart loses in it or gains

Unsteady beats and shallow breaths

Reminder constant of boon turned bane 

It is reality serious, not just a game

no matter life full or just inane

Endearing thoughts, no stopping on its own

need no sympathy, definitely not  disdain

when you, believe me, lose your heart 

Not really it is walk in park

Divine elation, and flights in clouds 

Nights be dark, falling to valleys apart

Uncertain feelings plenty
Contant questions, answers be none
Mind's flight rocky
Foggy in mind, clarity undone

However it seems,this I have to say

Knowing now, my feelings night and day

My world  changed forever, like baked clay

Your presence won't leave, no matter you go or stay

Manjari

No Going Back

Don't know why you tried it so

Wound given sometime ago

Did not think that one I adore

Will give my heart a heavy blow

Bringing you up sheltered you know

Control you call it , maybe so

Keeping you safe was job supreme

As was I brought up, sometime ago

Don't know terms that you apply

Or rules you think you comply

Yes there were limits as should be
Was given possibilities you deny

Don't want to list all that I did

Have done as found it loving and fit

And things you did and we kept hid

We brought you up without a script

Thinking alone now you can walk

Think, is okay at us to balk

Were you just watching time to clock

We stood rebuffed as thorny stalk

Not everyday that I get hurt
Only when remember you being curt
Did everything as one could do
Nothing for you, but only dirt

No I don't feel no joy, no malice
Life is no wonderland of Alice
To drink up, and have past restored
Don't think ever will find that Chalice

Manjari

Salvation

                                                       image source: https://static.pexels.com/photos/33109/fall-autumn-red-season.jpg

Is it in togetherness

Or is it in loneliness

Or life lived with delicate finesse 

Or is it too in roughness

Is really a matter of knowledge

Or is it just to count your breaths

May be to finally acknowledge

Things learnt before one's death

Drama of life's story line 

Why has to be one's play

Moving with waves up high 

Crashing on rocks in Bay

Purpose of circle of life

When one depends on another

What message really is there

Why does any of it matter

Making no sense in mind

Existence to feed another

Lives separate but entwined

In reality detached further

Why create to destruct it all

Universe or person small

A puzzle mysterious grand

Or a game, if any, at all

Have no control being puppet

Drama of love and hate

The mirage of Salvation !
Or a word much like Fate

Manjari

Be your Coal

Desiring a presence next to me
Who let me be, when I want to be
Just a floating soul in nature's sea
Interacting with flowers like a buzzing bee

May ripples be small, or waves quite big
Reveal my self, at times need to dig
Sun may scorch at my being at times
Be flower on cactus, no fear of pricks

I want my flock to fly up high
My soulmate next to me, by my side
Wanting just love even when there's fight
Existence together, my dream come alive

Giving off energy, then imbibing some
There is no other way to existence
Beating hearts' harmony in your presence
Music beautiful in your silence

Need no ladder and need no pole
No lofty aspirations exposing my shoal
Shining like a diamond not my goal
Warming your existence, let me be coal

Manjari

Beauty in being Alone

You helped me plant those trees

And grow those fragrant flowers

My self was swaying with glee

Above mire, my mirth then spired

I waited anxiously for spring

Cool breeze and balmy noons 

Realization did later bring

Flowers won't grow on sand dunes

When did my land become parched

Reached that steep rampart

Trousseau was pressed and starched

Came suddenly at seams apart 

Watched glowing clouds turn dark

Shadows engulfing heart

Blame none if I couldn't mark

Warnings conscious not hark

Look past those cactus dunes

Find precious moment opportune

Hark back my long lost soul

Or leave the course jejune

Swinging from highs to lows

Longing for life lived afore

Wishing it out of existence

Beauty in being left alone

Manjari

Adieu

Blessing in letting go !

Don't think I will know

You went away a little farther

Every time you bid Adieu 

Ambers will cool slowly

Steady will be beating heart

Not the pain for cowardly

Takes time to feel apart

Heart cries less each separation

Breathing has gotten better

Smoothness at each serration

Pain felt subsides later

Feeling of doom gone

Future no longer bleak

Ready to sing new song

The cracks no longer creak

Can't leap memories' mound

Fog of thoughts harsh, not kind

Go on, don't let the past hound

You left nothing here behind

May you too find joy abound

In future that you find

Don't rewind, I may not be around

No ropes to keep me bind 

Manjari

Destination

Who said it is only you and me

Show time passed, as others may see

Scars shine as deep, on earth as well

That beautify ageless face of thee

Those cracks in barks and rings of age

Hide truth undeciferable by any sage

Valleys so deep, mind can't fathom

Secrets are locked at bottom beige

Can't see the end from where it starts
Nor can fathom beauty impart

Illusion of sky just getting lost

Such is the majesty of crevices dark

Changing its colors from day to night

Are mysteries revealed only when bright?

Or secrets hidden display with time
No matter shallows or heavenly heights

Canyons so Grand, a wondrous place

Memories of eras bound to a space

Persisting waters ever so soft
Chiseling it's art in earth's carapace

They beckon me back again and again

Without them my life looks merely plain

Not just physical but spiritual whole
My soul's destination without fail

Manjari